~As I come up on another year older, many changes are coming about for me, for my family, for life in general. As many if not all of you know I became very sick, A sickness that in part I have been dealing with since I was a little girl(pre-school) and yet I always thought it would get better, etc..It ebbed and flowed just like anything in life does, and I am proud to say that I dealt pretty darn well over the last twenty something years until a few months ago when I started my slow and steady decline. As a single mom, and a single working mom I do not have time to get sick--PERIOD! So here I am getting better at home by taking too many medications to count after almost a week in the hospital and a diet/life style change, not to mention a mental change if you will. Blogging helps my soul and it may not always be happy and peppy so if that is what people expect I am sorry, this is how I get it out there so to speak. :P I have always been honest, and upfront and here I am doing it again! Haha!
Back to beauty--I am starting to see crow's feet where there used to be none, laugh lines, frown lines, and all lines in between. Dark circles, bags under my eyes that are hidden with well placed make up, and the woman who looks back at me in the mirror, I think who is she? Where have I gone? As women we become wives, take care of spouses, then we give up our bodies for 9 months for children should we choose to have them, then the next 18 PLUS years caring for them, and all the while cleaning house, cooking, working if you choose or need to, all the while looking fabulous and looking for the ultimate beauty product to end all products! The one that will erase the time, and lately I have found myself with a lot of free time to think, research my new diagnosis, and Jason asked me well...What are some of the hobbies you have? I had no answer, my kids, my home, my job--are those my hobbies? Hell no! I need hobbies that fullfill me, keep me well...sane! So yesterday on a whim I ordered a swimsuit, a one piece, that has a retro 1940's feel and it came today, was just a store to store order so easy pick up for sure! I am a size 6! I tried it on and felt well...pretty....:P I bought it because my Dr has given me the ok for "light" exercise, must stress the "light" part because of my colitis anything and I do mean anything can trigger it. I am going to hopefully tomorrow have Jason drive me to my gym and I am going to swim, which I love or rather tread water in the beginners class of water aerobics with all of my cotton tops who I love! I am excited that maybe this will open doors to hobbies, Who Sarah is now that she is almost(sigh) 32 years old, and really is starting over in the hobby department! I also read tons of books but again that to me does not scream HELLO HOBBY! I need something for me. I have a dear friend who retired from the Air Force this past May, it was hard for her to find her niche' and now a year later she is pumped up, running, working out tons and is so happy. I hope to find that happiness in a hobby/passion....I want my passion, my fire again.
Finally today was a long day, filled with the ever increasing nasty medications they have me on that leave me feeling like I am walking in cement or sand or a combo of both. At times my speech is slurred I feel so tired, there is no way I could work in this state and surgery is scheduled on April 23rd so I will go back after that ready to start anew! I am blessed my leadership has such faith in me! They want Sarah back and frankly so do I, I have such a great boss and work place...I am blessed beyond measure! I must say though I am becoming nervous for surgery, hate getting poked and prodded, seems the norm for me these days...But Jason and I knew the kids needed to get out of the house so I look little Lady Violet with the red hair to the health food store for a few "necessities" with this new Gluten free lifestyle that is quite pricey, and Jason took the twins and Molly dog on a walk and played at the play ground. They had a ball, and were in bed by 7! I picked up our groceries that should last a week, lot's of lean protein, fresh veggies and fruits, and a lot of Gluten free goodies(Sarcasm)...I guess I am not used to the taste yet but will get there! I have a new found love for Almond milk though, it is tasty and does not kill my stomach in the process, dairy free for me!
I will wind down now, but as always I love you all...Thank you for the support I always get be it checking in on me or anything. Means the world and is never forgotten. Feel free to comment, etc..if you wish!
Have a blessed night, my couch is calling my name so here I go...<3
~S
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