Yesterday it was 67 degrees and sunny, with beautiful fluffy clouds-perfection. I had several errands I had to run in addition to housework and my 700 loads of laundry. Ha! Yet I let myself just BE, breathe in the ocean air as I was driving and how awesome it was. My scenery was beautiful water and white sandy beaches...Yes-Pinch me! I live here! That is what I focus on when I am feeling overwhelmed which is pretty much all the time, I am nearing my mid-thirties, I am a degree holder, strong medical back round and cannot find a better job. So 8 months ago I decided to take a job that would provide, and that is what I needed. It was a job that paid minimum wage, I went from working for the government and making a great living to making literally 70% LESS. Yes it was a blow to my ego, but guess what---I had/have a job. There was nothing out there and sadly still is nothing out there but I try daily and will continue to network and do my personal best. Is this a job where I make tons and have not a worry? NOPE but guess what...I decided I had to do it for my kids, my family and so here I am 8 months later still in the same place. I do not have fancy cars, fancy anything really but I have enough to help put my food on my table, a roof over our heads and I feel that is all I need. I hope and pray daily that something else will come through but I also believe I am in this job for a reason, I had to step out of a very comfy zone and become very humble. Perhaps to make a difference in some small way? Who knows but I trust God has my back and he is providing and giving me work-albeit not my first choice it is WORK. I was reminded of this today when a person I know poked fun at a thirty something working at Starbuck's. My reply-At least I am out there doing SOMETHING and not sitting at home waiting for something else to come along. I am trusting that there is a plan I just wish my Type A self would remember that when I am feeling less than stellar. God has my back-he is good-he has a plan and I need/must trust in that! Life has taken me to so many places, I have seen and done things I am so darn proud of and that is WHY I do what I must for my family NO MATTER WHAT. The Air Force was never in my thoughts through school age years, I was quite strong willed for those who know me well, and when I was young I did not take direction and people telling me what to do well. I was quite a brat honestly! I remember telling my family I was joining the Air Force, and I was leaving in a few weeks. My family laughed and thought my bossy nature would not mesh well with the Air Force and the military in general. I remember raising my right hand, my parents video taped it, I promised to protect and defend no matter what and then I was an AIRMAN. They put us all on buses and took us to LAX, my family to include my best friend Vanessa met us there and we waited at the terminal. This was pre 9/11 and so I had my gaggle of people waiting with me. I was nervous, scared, excited and knew that once I stepped on that plane my life would NEVER be the same. I would be my own person, managing my own money, my own belongings and I would be supporting this great nation, The United States of America. It still gives me chills. I hugged my mom, we cried, I hugged my dad and he told me he was proud of me, snuggled my siblings that I would miss so very much and finally hugged Vanessa. My sister, my best friend, my family-leaving her behind is how I felt and to this day no matter where life takes me I always take her with me in my heart just as I do with all of my family and very good friends. There are things that remind me of that time when I was active duty, yesterday I heard the deep roar of a C-130 starting up, getting ready to take off, I pulled over to watch. To look at what freedom looks like, that aircraft helps military oversees and in this war on terror that is still going on despite what the news may say. That heavy as I call it, began to taxi and finally the aircraft took off for parts unknown. Daily I am reminded of how special the military is and I believe that is what has helped me get through some very tough times, because I have my life, my family and what a blessing that is. I have many friends that have since retired, separated and are still in as well as Jason still being in and about to pin on MSgt. Every single person has made a difference in my life and I thank each of you for that! I believe my humble beginnings as a poor Airman has helped me in my difficult times I have faced as an adult these past 15 or so months with being unemployed and then taking a job that at first I felt was beneath me. Now I know how wrong I was to think that, it is to make me a better person, perhaps a more understanding person? A more kind person? A more strong adult/women/mommy/friend/daughter-I encourage you all to be others cheerleaders because it is not an easy time job-wise and I know far too many people that are struggling much like myself BUT we all have our health and those around us to lean on when we fall. Catch those when needed and encourage always. Life is a one time deal, one shot and we never know how long our time here is so sit back and enjoy-Life is a precious gift.
Thanks to my readers-if any! Haha!
~S
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