Life is movin'...Yet I feel as if it is passing me by?

Do you ever feel like life is passing you by? I sure hope I am not alone in this feeling because this feeling has been occupying too much space in my head/heart lately. Have I missed "the boat?" I guess I should back track, My baby sister is headed to UCLA in a few weeks, my other baby sister is a Respitory Therapist and just got an awesome job (SOOOOO PROUD OF THEM BOTH!) My other brother is a successful firefighter as my dad is, and my mom is a nurse. I am so proud of my family, they have done and are doing amazing things yet I feel a tug if you will at my ego/heart strings/whatever it might be....What have I done? Yes I went into the Air Force many moons ago, it molded me into well an Airman...I was so proud of all the things I did while I was in and I miss it daily...Almost as if part of me is missing, even years later after getting out. It is strange how something so profound and important can continue to make such a huge impact on your life even years later. I was part of something special, I met special people and I still hold many of those friendships very close to my heart. Sadly I have also lost friends to the war, and I still hold those people in my heart, always will. Yet lately I have been struggling to put it honestly, YES I am in school...Working on my Masters degree, while being a stay at home mommmy, and working a few hours a week at Starbucks and soon to be working at Twin Cities hospital in Niceville(YAY!) I can dust off the EMT skills, and the stethoscope! I am very excited for that job, it will be a nice setting, among wonderful people and I am so excited about this new venture! Yet....I still feel "Off"...Why? I prayed for kids, a family, and I got those things ten-fold, yet why am I not happy with what I have been given? The blessings are so bountiful and yet daily I find myself struggling...I love my babies more than anything yet I guess they are getting to the age where they want to be going ALL The TIME! They are learning who they are, finding their little/big personalities and I must say....WOWZERS~ Personalities they sure do have! Haha! Do other parents out there ever feel this way? Hardly anyone reads my blog so I might just be writing to well no one BUT I have to believe that these feelings are normal. I talked to my dad the other day and he said it is normal, reminded me of what I have and how being a parent is the biggest joy with which I totally agree! My trio is my world, but with that being said I miss working full time, I miss adult conversation, and yes I get it at work thankfully to some extent BUT I still miss my previous life of working full time and making a solid contribution to the family house hold so to speak. Now with all that I have been blabbering on about I made the solid decision to go to Nursing school next fall 2014, that is my dream, and it is something I will accomplish and I will do it with as much passion as I put into everything else in my life. From the time I entered the Air Force I knew that one day I would be a nurse, an RN, and that I would make that a goal I would accomplish. I knew the timing had to be correct and when I had my babies of course that was not the time, then our move to Florida changed up the game once again and now I am preparing my babes for Kindergarten next fall and I will go back to school when they are in school. I am doing this while they are young, so that I do not miss too much of their lives because their lives are much more important than mine...It is a complex and delicate balance isn't it? Being a parent, a working parent, a stay at home parent, a parent in school, a parent in the military, a single parent, etc...It is a delicate balance, a delicate dance of sorts and with each day that passes I am learning, I am learning to be a better person, a more giving person...I am learning, that is the key word here, the key element and each day is a NEW DAY TO MAKE A DIFFERENCE! A smile, an email or a text to a friend letting them know they are special, all of those things make a difference. This blog is my outlet, and there are times where it is all over the place-kind of like now! Ha! I guess at the end of a very long day, my kids are snuggled into their beds dreaming sweet dreams with their babies and blankets keeping them warm and secure...I finished my homework for the day, have had a chance to listen to some music and allow it to take me back to a time in my life that was filled with memories-music has an awesome way of being our very own time traveling machine of sorts, and finally I am able to sit...reflect...and prepare for tomorrow. Tomorrow is a new day, I plan to take the babes to the beach, study a little bit and do my favorite thing, yard work! :) Life is good, life is beautiful, life is a gift people-embrace that gift and run with it! I will post some pictures I have been taking with my new fancy camera, I am able to capture such beauty behind my lense, and I hope to get better at it so that I can make scrap books for my trio and who knows---Maybe picture taking will take me on a new journey as well! You never know-I appreciate the support and my readers---If there are any!!

XOXO
~Sarah