Tuesday talks, thoughts..

I love talking to my sister, she is a sophomore at UCLA and part of a sorority, I seriously could NOT be prouder! She is living it, she is working her butt off and doing it well.  She inspires me, which I am sure she has no idea but she does. You see I was a teenager when H ca
me into this world, and she was my real life baby doll that I took with me EVERYWHERE! At just a few months old she was my best friend and still is.  We fight like crazy at times, and we fight exactly...Alike...because we are EXACTLY ALIKE.  I look at pictures of her and she is just beautiful, her smile lights up a room and she is hilarious.  Our family is hilarious but she has this specific sense of humor that only our family and close friends really get.  Tonight we got to talk for over an hour, we caught up and it was nice-minus the few snippy comments toward one another-We are the original Gilmore girls after all!! This week-wait it is only Tuesday-I signed the pre-operative paperwork to FINALLY have my total hysterectomy.  After a decade plus of pain, near misses of cancer, scares, miscarriages, I am done. I have three happy, and healthy and BEAUTIFUL children.  God has blessed me more times than I can count and it is time.  Time for no more pain, no more frustration, NO MORE.  My sister and I talked about how I was scared but she reminded me that I have been through so much, this is necessary for me, for my family.  So on February 27th I will go in for surgery, be out of commission for a few weeks I would guess and start this new year feeling great-finally.  I am still eating right, I have a strong exercise plan until surgery then after I will resume. 

I work with wonderful people, people that have quickly become dear friends and people I hold close in my heart.  We listen to each other when we are having one of those days, we hand a tissue over when a tear or two escapes and we are there.  For each other.  This is by far the most emotionally taxing job I have had in a very long time but on the flip side it is the most rewarding.  I have met people that truly have helped bring me back to life-I miss my babies all day, everyday as I am working and am so excited the minute I pick them up.  It is a tough transition indeed but one that was necessary and not one that I could avoid, the kids had to start their school life.  I miss the babies, but I am lucky...They still LOVE their cuddles, their kisses and their parents.  I know, I know I complain that it is taxing at times that they are always all over me but I would not want it any other way.  What can I say other than -I AM BLESSED. 

My sister quickly reminded me tonight that things are good, despite some things that have J and I a tad stressed-life is good sis, life is good(Per H!) So my friends I will go to bed with a full heart, a blessed life and hold on to that.  For when I have down moments, I remember all the good!  My plans for the next little bit is simple-enjoy more, complain less.  YES I have about 25 pounds that I HATE, I will get rid of it with time, YES work is not perfect but I have found my bliss, my joy despite within the people I call my work family, and YES life itself is tough but I choose to focus on the GOOD.  YES I am nervous as hell to have surgery but I have an army sized support system and then some.
I bid you all a good night but I ask you this:

What do you do when you feel overwhelmed? Keep it in?  Talk it out? Write it out?  I am learning to be more spiritually, mentally, and physically healthy as well as positive(Glass half full kinda gal!)

Namaste my friends...Love to all...And to my sister-you are my best friend, my person, and I cannot wait to see you SOON!

~S